Hey ladies, it's Friday again - which is a great thing for most Americans - unless you're a girl dreading your sports obligations for the weekend. You already know what amazing outfit you're gonna wear, and you're excited about that. But you at least need to show/fake some type of engagement in the game itself so that you're not type cast into the amazingly dressed, yet stuck up girl that's too good for football. Here's another tip:
Small sayings will save you. A well-dressed woman can totally dismiss snooty status by simply uttering appropriately timed football comments. For example:
Situation: Anytime a quarterback is sacked (tackled before they have a chance to pass it)
Response: "You gotta throw that away"
Situation: Anytime a player is escorted off the field either by stretcher or by his teammates
Response: "You hate to see that"
Situation: Anytime a flag is thrown or you're aware there is a penalty
Response: "We got laundry"
If all else fails, ask one of the males you're with "What's the spread on this game?" This has to do with gambling - that's all you need to know. You'll most likely get a response that is a number, and at that point you simply nod your head affirmatively. If on the off chance someone replies with more than just a numeric response they're just talking to hear their own voice and sound smart. Once again, the appropriate response is just to nod affirmatively when they're finished talking.
Yay football! Yay ladies that (pretend to) like football!